Safety and Security of Senior Citizens

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  I highlighted on spending quality time during second innings of life in various posts in my blog. Today I am writing this article to emphasis on safety and security which is equally important to enable us to spend quality time during second innings. The safety and security aspects will be discussed in this article in two parts.

1.  Safety and Security at Home 

2.  Safety and Security outside the Home

1. Safety and Security at Home: 

 All the senior citizens are required to take care of their safety and security at home from external threats as well as from internal threats. 

1. (i) Safety and Security from external threats: 

    External threats are the threats that comes to us from the sources outside our home. Strangers visiting your home may be an external threat. If you are staying in an apartment then your apartment is under common security provided by the Society or Apartment Owners' Association whatsoever may be. The security guards monitor the entry and exit of visitors inside the Housing Complex at the entrance of Housing Complex. Many Housing Complexes monitor the entry and exit of visitors not only through visitors register but also through CCTV cameras installed at the entrance of the Housing Complex and at the entrance of individual block or building. In addition, there is a mobile app called 'MyGate' which allow the visitor to enter if it is approved by the individual apartment owner. MyGate app is having multiple functions like visitor management, Community Management, Payment of Society Dues, etc. The link of MyGate app is MyGate. In addition there is an another app i.e. Gatekeeper App whose link is ApnaComplex. 

     Even after having common security arrangement in residential complexes, one need to be vigilant when a visitor is entering inside the apartment. One should have peephole as well as safety chain on the entrance door of flat or apartment. Peephole or magic eye is a small round opening lens through a door from which a person staying inside the house or apartment can see directly outside the door. Viewing is possible only in one direction through these lenses. Various types of peepholes or door viewers are available which one can buy online from amazon, flipkart, IndiaMART and many other sites. The link for amazon, flipkart and IndiaMART are 

(i) Amazon 

(ii) Flipkart and

(iii) India Mart. 

       In addition to peephole, safety door chain on the entrance door of house or apartment is required for additional security for preventing threat from unknown visitors knocking the door. Safety chain allows a person to open the door partially for safe viewing and speaking to visitors before deciding whether to open the door fully. Various types of safety chains are available which one can buy online from amazon whose link is Amazon. 

    Before permitting security guard at the main entrance of your housing complex for allowing entry of any visitor please ensure the identity of the visitor. Once the visitor knocks your door please see through peephole or magic eye to ensure the identity of the person knocking your door. If the person is unknown then open the door partially by putting safety chain on door. 

    Security cameras should be installed at home so that you can have eyes on your home even when you are outside the home. Have some emergency contact numbers and share it with your trusted neighbours. 

1.(ii) Safety and Security from internal threats:

   There are certain threats which a person may have to face while staying in home and these threats are not from external sources but exists within the close door of home. Unawareness about these internal threats may lead to accident. Security threat may come from kitchen, washroom, floor, etc. Wet floor is very dangerous and one may slip leg which may cause injury and bone fracture. Whenever you find water droplets on your floor, please get it wiped as soon as possible. Floor should be dry and clutter free. There are instances of slipping in washroom because of wet floor. After taking bath, please wipe out water on bathroom's floor to outlet with the help of wiper. This will help in keeping bathroom floor dry and clean. 

    There is another threat that may arise from your kitchen. Many times, kitchen floor become wet while cooking or washing vegetables. This may also lead to accident due to leg slip. Please keep your kitchen floor dry. Kitchen burner or gas oven should be handled carefully otherwise it may lead to fire hazard. After finishing your cooking turn of the knobs of gas oven as well as regulator of gas cylinder / gas pipeline to prevent gas leakage.  Don't forget to switch of electrical appliances in the kitchen after use. Keep fire extinguisher inside your home and also know how to use it in case of any fire hazard. 

      Have an emergency medical kit with thermometer, gloves, cotton, gauze, sterile cleaning solutions, BP / Blood Sugar monitor. Dim light in your bedroom and bathroom should be always on at night. Keep a loud alarm bell in addition to mobile phone beside the bed to enable you to call for help in case of emergency.  

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2. Safety and Security outside the Home:

One has to be more aware of one's safety and security while staying outside the home. While using staircase one should mind the steps while going downstairs as well as upstairs. It is better to hold staircase railing while using staircase as it protects us from injury in case of slipping of steps especially while going downstairs. If you are moving out of your home for going to vacation or tour then you have to take certain precautions as listed hereunder.

(i) Before leaving your home please ensure that all the water taps are closed, knob of domestic gas supply is put off, all your electrical appliances inside the home are totally switched off, all your windows as well as doors are closed and entrance door is properly locked. 

(ii) At this age never try to lift your luggage otherwise it may lead to orthopaedic problems. Instead use trolley bag to carry your luggage. You may find various types of trolley bags on Wildcraft, Meesho, Nashermiles and also on various online shopping sites. 

(iii) If you are travelling abroad then please have travel and medical insurance.

(iv) Please carry your regular medicines and doctor's prescription whenever you move out of your home for tour or vacation. In addition, please also carry some other common medicines and ointments to be used in case of any injury or other health issues as first aid. Please also have the information and contact number of Doctors in the locality where you are visiting so that you can have consultation in case of serious health issues. 

(v)  Carry your mobile phone whenever you move out from your home. Please keep your near and dear informed about the places where you are going and have their contact numbers to be used in case of emergency. 

(vi)  Please avoid posting your photograph taken at airport or Railway station in social media especially when you are on tour. 

(vii) Note down the vehicle registration number of your hired cab and informed that number to your friend in that locality in the presence of cab driver. It will be better to share the contact number of cab driver to your friend so that in case your friend is not able to contact you then he or she can contact your cab driver. 

      Let us have secured second innings to have quality life with full of joy and pleasures. Share this with your friends and relatives having elders in their home.

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Enjoyment During Durga Puja Festival (Sharad Utsav)

Enjoyment During Durga Puja Festival (Sharad Utsav) 

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     Every year we enjoy Sharad Utsav with family and friends. Sharad Utsav i.e. Durga Puja Festival is celebrated in a big way in the state of West Bengal, India. However, it is also celebrated in other states in India. During previous two years we enjoyed this festival in a very restrictive manner because of pandemic situation due to spread of COVID-19. Sharad Utsav during this year is important for me because I could freely enjoy this festival with my family for the first time after retirement. UNESCO in December 2021 declared Durga Puja in Kolkata as an Intangible Cultural Heritage of Humanity. It is a religious festival that has become a cultural and secular event. This festival has also become a space for social, artistic and cultural activities. Cultural programmes i.e., singing, dance, drama, etc., are organised during this festival. Many amateur artists get opportunity during this festival to portray their talents by performing in cultural events. 

     

        Like every year this year also Durga Puja was celebrated in our residential complex. Since my wife was Cultural Secretary of Durga Puja Committee in our residential complex, we focussed all our attention to the events in our residential complex and therefore up to Dashami i.e. upto 5th October, 2022 we could not venture outside to see other Durga Puja Pandals. There was an arrangement of paid community lunch and breakfast in our residential complex for four days from Maha Saptami (on October 02, 2022) to Dashami (on October 05, 2022). We enjoyed breakfast and community lunch during day time and cultural programme during night. My wife was involved in conducting cultural programmes and she herself participated in some cultural events. 

                                 (Durga Puja in our residential complex)👉

     This year New Town's first Centrally organised Durga Puja was celebrated in New Town, Kolkata. This is Centrally organised Durga Puja because this is the first community Durga Puja which is not exclusive to any block or housing complex. It was celebrated in the ground behind the Clock Tower in Action Area1 of New Town. This was organised by the New Town Sarbojanin Durgotsab Samiti which is an association of residents of New Town, Kolkata and backed by West Bengal Housing Infrastructure Development Corporation (WBHIDCO) and New Town Kolkata Development Authority (NKDA). New Town is a satellite city of Kolkata. Apart from this, Durga Puja is celebrated in various blocks and residential complex of New Town, Kolkata. Our Housing Complex is in New Town, Kolkata and Durga Puja is celebrated every year in our Housing Complex.   

 I along with my wife and youngest son visited the pandal of New Town's first Centrally organised Durga Puja on October 06, 2022 i.e. the next day of Bijoya Dashami. You may see the picture of Durga Puja Pandal of New Town's first centrally organised Durga Puja on left hand side. Traditional arts and sculptures were exhibited inside the pandal which enhanced its beauty which you may observe from this picture. An overarching message that the Organiser of this Durga Puja wanted to send out is 'Women's Empowerment' and therefore all the four priests, twelve dhakis (drummers) and about a dozen of dhunuchi dancers were women in this Durga Puja. This is the speciality of this Durga Puja. Dhunuchi dance is a devotional dance performed to thank Goddess Durga by holding a dhunuchi i.e., earthen pot containing the burning coconut husk with dhuno (frankincense) sprinkled on it. 

    This year we enjoyed the festival by active participations in various events organised by the Durga Puja Committee of our Housing Complex. This festival gives us the opportunity to meet with other residence of our Housing Complex. I take this opportunity to develop understanding with other residence in our Housing Complex and to create new contacts. This is the occasion when there are maximum interactions amongst the people. With every passing day this festival is becoming more social and cultural event than the religious one. Almost all the people in the State of West Bengal, India eagerly wait for this festive season but some sections of people like tailors, decorators, idol makers, artisans, dhakis, singers, caterers, traders, etc. wait for this festival not only for mere enjoyment but also for livelihoods. For me this is a festival of joy as various cultural events during this programme give me full of joy and pleasures. I whole heartedly enjoyed this festival and will enjoy other upcoming festivals. 

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Enjoying the evening and morning on riverside

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I enjoy riverside and seabeach. On September 22, 2022 I started my travel with my wife to her parental house in Falta, West Bengal, India. I myself drove my electric vehicle from my residence at New Town, Kolkata to Falta which is about 60 kilometres away from my residence. I always enjoy long driving. 

    

 First two days we took rest and did shopping. We enjoyed greeneries around my parent-in-laws house. On 24th September, I along with my brother-in-law who is in teaching profession, went to a village named Burul on the bank of river Hooghly by his scooty. We both enjoyed the sunset on riverside. Burul is at a distance of 7.9 kilometres from Falta. Burul is a small riverside village located in 24 Parganas South district of West Bengal, India and is approximately 35 km distance from Alipur, Kolkata. It's a perfect weekend destination near Kolkata. This place is ideal for one night stay or day outing. One may prefer to stay in resort near riverside. After enjoying the sunset on riverside at Burul we came back to Falta. 

     On 25th Morning at 5.15 am I myself and my wife together started walking towards riverside of Hooghly River in Falta. There was total traffic jam due to increased number of vehicles moving towards riverside and there was huge crowd on the road. Therefore, instead of taking our vehicle we preferred to walk. The rush was due to Mahalaya. Mahalaya is an auspicious day which marks the beginning of Durga Puja Celebrations. This day marks the beginning of Devi Paksha and the end of Pitri Paksha. On this day many people offer prayers to the departed soul of their ancestors on the bank of river. Therefore, there was huge crowd towards river Hooghly in the early morning. 

I had taken selfie covering the crowd of devotees who came to the bank of river Hooghly to offer prayers to the departed soul of their ancestors. The devotees remain on fast till the completion of their prayer to the departed soul of their ancestors. Offering prayer to the departed soul of ancestors during Mahalaya is called 'Tarpan'. Devotees break their fast after performing Tarpan and therefore there was an arrangement for breakfast on the bank of river Hooghly. In addition, there were many food stalls on road side parallel to the river. We also purchased local sweet called Jilepi and got it packed so that we can enjoy breakfast together with all at home. We started walking toward home and we reached there after half an hour due to crowd and movement of vehicles.

        We enjoyed our evening as well as morning on the bank of river Hooghly. On 25th of September 2022, we came back to our residence at New Town, Kolkata. After coming back to our residence, we started preparing ourselves to enjoy the festival of Durga Puja to be started within a week. This festival is celebrated in a big way in the State of West Bengal, India. This festival is also celebrated in other states in India. I will come back to you very soon in another post on our enjoyment in Durga Puja festival.

     

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👈 Devotees assembled on the bank of River Hooghly to perform Tarpan

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Time Management – Its Importance During Second Innings of Life 

The importance of time management for an organization as well as for an individual is known to everyone. We generally talk about the importance of time management for an individual during student and working life. But time management is equally important for a person during post retirement life.  

       When we talk about retirement, we mean retirement from job not from life. A person can have dreams even after retirement. Retirement is an opportunity to explore yourself and to fully concentrate on fulfilling your dreams. You can set new goals and make your post retirement life meaningful. A person can even change the course of life and reach to a new height of success during the second innings of life. Colonel Harland Sanders at the age of 62 founded Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC), fast-food chains which expanded internationally having more than 25,000 restaurants in over 145 countries and territories around the World.

     Without time management it is not possible to fulfil your dreams after retirement. Without it, it is even not possible to make your post retirement life simple, healthy and peaceful. Time management ensures fulfilling your dreams within targeted dates. It also ensures the continuity of your daily routine activities which are essential for maintaining your physical, mental and spiritual health. You may find articles on maintaining physical, mental and spiritual health in this blog.

     After the age of 60 one has on an average 15 years of active life. Therefore, there is a need for time management for achieving goals during one’s active life. Time management during post retirement life needed to be done on daily basis, short- term basis, medium-term basis and long-term basis. Before that one need to make an exhaustive list of desires to be fulfilled during post retirement life. After that one need to identify the desires to be fulfilled on daily basis, short-term basis, medium-term basis and long-term basis and accordingly time management has to be done.

       Time Management for fulfilling long-term desires: During post-retirement stage, one’s long term should be for a maximum period of five years. It is important to identity the desires or goals that can be achieved in long term. For example, if your desire is for having leisure tour abroad and you need to arrange resources for that purpose then you can treat it as your long-term goal. If you have sufficient resources for the same then you can plan it for short-term. After identifying your long-term desires set goals with deadlines for its achievement. Please remember that without deadlines your desires will remain in your dream and will never become reality. Merely setting goals and its deadlines are not sufficient. You need to make desired action plans for achieving your goals and to continuously following it up. Action plans needs to be monitored and follow up on daily basis as well as on weekly basis. It needs to be reviewed at quarterly interval. Allocate certain fixed time in a day for your desired action plans for which you need to do time management on daily basis though your goal is to be achieved in long term. Please remember that even for your long-term goal your activity should be on daily basis.

       Time Management for fulfilling Medium-term desires: You may have certain desires which you need to fulfil within a year or two. For such medium-term desires you need to set goals with its deadlines to be achieved within a year or two. Make desired action plans for achieving your goals within its deadlines and have continuous follow up on daily and weekly basis. Have a review of your action plans on monthly basis.

     Time Management for fulfilling Short-term desires: There may be certain desires which you want to fulfill within a month or quarter. As discussed earlier you have to set goals with deadlines and make desired action plans for fulfilling your short-term desires. Continuous follow up of action plans on daily basis with its review on weekly basis is required.

     Time Management for fulfilling Daily desires:  You might have decided before retirement the activities and hobbies to be pursued after retirement. If you have decided your hobbies then it need to be cultured on daily basis. For example, if you have decided to do gardening then you need to do it daily on regular basis for which you have to allocate certain time. To keep yourself healthy you may have to do certain light exercises including morning walk for which you have to allocate certain time. For fulfilling your short-term, medium-term and long-term desires you need to allocate certain time every day for implementing its action plans for fulfilling those desires. You have to arrive at the total time needed daily for your desired activities. Please remember that in addition to time allocated for such activities you need time for fulfilling your biological requirements like sleep, rest and leisure, taking meals, etc. If time is not sufficient then you need to prioritize your activities.

          Time management is important not only during working life but also equally important during post-retirement life. Without time management one cannot fulfil one’s dream. Procrastination is the biggest barrier in initiating action to achieve goals which can be overcome by proper time management and continuous follow up of action plans. Many time we fail to fulfil our desires because of interruptions and distractions. Most of the interruptions and distractions are within our control and can be managed with proper time management techniques like bunching of interruptions, having quiet time for increased focus on activities and goals.

       Lack of time management is found more during post retirement life of a person because of absence of Boss. Since we are habituated to be disciplined by parents and teachers during student life and by Boss during working life, it becomes very difficult for us to be self-disciplined. This is the biggest challenge for a person to have time management for achieving goals during post retirement life.

        Be your own Boss and be accountable to yourself is the only way to be self-disciplined during post retirement life. This will lead you to fulfill your dreams and may enable you to reach a new height of success during post retirement life. Let us prove that retirement is not an end but a new beginning of life. 

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Post Retirement Life - Various Stages and Challenges

Post Retirement Life -  Various Stages and Challenges

Life after retirement goes through the following four stages.                                                                (i) Honeymoon stage                                      

(ii) Active stage                                     

(iii)Disenchantment stage                    

(iv)Stability stage   

Let us discuss the challenges that a retiree faces during various stages and how to face those challenges in subsequent paragraphs.                                                                       

2. Honeymoon stage: This stage starts just after the retirement when a retiree is much excited about his or her retirement and is more excited to lead a free life when there will not be any binding to go to office. At this stage a retiree is having much expectation from post retirement life as similar to a person joining as a fresher in new job. At this stage one has lot of dreams and expectations from post retirement life. Investment of retirement corpus are made to generate a stable source of passive income and one freely spend time with spouse and friends. Planning for vacations and tours, meeting with relatives and friends, pursuing hobbies, etc., are made at this stage. Many retirees plan for pursuing new hobbies and activities. The excitement is maximum at this stage. 

3. Active Stage:  Honeymoon stage lasts for 2-3 months and thereafter active stage starts. At this stage a retiree is very enthusiastic to implement the decisions taken during honeymoon stage. A person starts doing activities planned during honeymoon stage. A person starts pursuing both old and new hobbies at this stage. Maximum tours and travels are planned during this stage. Active stage lasts for 2-10 years depending on the continuity of a person's enthusiasm and energy level. Period of this stage varies from person to person depending on various factors as described hereunder. 

3.1 Planning too many activities: Many persons planned too many activities during honeymoon stage out of over enthusiasm. Later on, they find it difficult to pursue all those activities planned by them. Activities and hobbies to be selected should be of one's liking and should be implementable on consistent basis. It is better to select few activities and hobbies initially and thereafter to be reviewed periodically to assess its implement ability on consistent basis. Based on one's own review one may either reduce or increase the number of activities to be pursued. 

3.2 Distractions: We are not able to consistently pursue our selected hobbies and activities due to distractions and lack of discipline. Unnecessary thoughts and fears act as distractions. Spending more time in social media is a major distraction. Spending time in social media needed to be optimized. If you are serious about your hobbies, then make a daily schedule for your hobbies and activities and allocate reasonable time for each hobby and activity. Make it a point to keep yourself away from social media and electronic gazette during your scheduled time for activities. This will create self-discipline with increased focus on your hobbies and activities. In addition, have milestones for the achievement of your goal. Milestones will ensure your movement towards the goal. 

3.3 Loss of Enthusiasm: Loss of enthusiasm is another factor reducing active life after retirement. Maintenance and sustenance of enthusiasm can enhance the period of active stage after retirement. Enthusiasm vanishes rapidly if activities were not planned on realistic basis during honeymoon stage. Loss of enthusiasm is due to inability to pursue hobbies or activities and also due to unfulfilled desires. Make it a point to have daily activities moving towards fulfilling your unfulfilled desires. Listening to music while relaxing and reading good motivational books on daily basis will help in keeping you enthusiastic. I would like to recommend the book " Finish What You Start " written by Peter Hollins. 

3.4 Poor Time Management: Poor time management is another reason for inability to pursue the decided activities and hobbies on a consistent basis. Many persons are of the opinion that time management is having its importance in working life only. Time management is having its importance in every stage of our life including post retirement life. Time management is most important during post retirement life because our remaining active life is limited and gradually reducing after each passing day. 

4. Disenchantment Stage:  At this stage, a retired person is less excited about post retirement life. There is a feeling of boredom and loneliness. A person starts feeling useless. This may be due to several health challenges or frustration crept in due to problems in interpersonal relationship with near and dears or it may be due to non-fulfilment of desires which a person decided to fulfil after retirement. There may be several reasons for a retired person to come to this stage. There are persons directly moving from active stage to stability stage without going through disenchantment stage. To come out from this stage a person needs to identify the reasons for entering to this stage. If it is due to health challenge because of old age-related diseases then one need to accept it as natural and continue its treatment. Focus may be shifted to other interesting things like hobbies, listening to music, reading interesting books, cherishing old good memories in life, etc. If it is because of frustration crept in due to problems in interpersonal relationship with near and dear then one need to identify the reasons and accordingly sort it out with. If despite your sincere efforts you are not able to improve relationship then it is better to simply forgive and forget. I have already discussed the issues on interpersonal relationship in my previous post 'Interpersonal Relationship During Post Retirement Life - Challenges and Remedies' the link of which is given below.

https://post-retirementlife.blogspot.com/2022/08/interpersonal-relationship-during-post.html

One important thing should be kept in mind that a person's life is always useful irrespective of age and health condition. Therefore, never feel useless. If you can lead your retirement life with this attitude then you will never pass through this stage of post retirement life.

5. Stability Stage: Retirees are content and satisfied with their retirement life at this stage. This stage generally starts after 10-15 years of retirement day. Retirees are settled into their retirement lifestyle doing the things of their liking. They prefer to make their life simple and relaxing at this stage. Those retirees who successfully pursued their hobbies and carried out their planned activities for achieving their unfulfilled desires are satisfied with their retirement life and they come to this stability stage of retirement and remain in this stage till the end of their life. 

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Interpersonal Relationship During Post Retirement Life - Challenges and Remedies

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I emphasised on the importance of interpersonal relationship in my previous post. One of my friend and old colleague suggested me to write on challenges in maintaining interpersonal relationship and its remedies. I am therefore writing this article focussing on challenges in maintaining good interpersonal relationship during post retirement life and its remedies. 

2. Interpersonal Relationship during Post Retirement Life: After retirement there is a sudden decline in the number of persons in your regular contact. This decline is due to your separation from the organisation in which you were working. During working life, the number of people in your contact increases due to working relationship with your colleagues irrespective of organisational hierarchy and also due to customer relationship i.e., relationship with the customers of organisation in which you are working. The wideness in the number of regular contacts depends on the nature of work that you are handling in an organisation. For example, if you are looking after Human Resources then your area of contacts within and outside the organisation will be wide. Area of contacts of public servant is even wider due to their nature of work which increases their exposure to public in large. After retirement there is a sudden shrink in the number active regular contacts which are mostly due to drastic reduction in contacts of your colleagues and customers. This is but natural and it happens with every person after retirement. One should be mentally prepared for this at least one or two years before retirement. 

      The question of interpersonal relationship with a person arises when you are in contact with that person. The question of interpersonal relationship does not arise with the persons with whom you are no more in contact. After retirement your interpersonal relationship with your spouse, family members, relatives, friends, neighbours, etc., matters.  

3. Challenges in interpersonal relationship: There are challenges in interpersonal relationship with various persons after retirement. However, the challenges are not same in every type of relationships. Let us discuss these challenges vis-a-vis its remedies in details.

3.1 With Spouse: 

The interpersonal relationship with spouse matter most and therefore should be given the top priority. You need to maintain good interpersonal relationship with spouse throughout the life as you and only your spouse will be together for maximum period during the journey of your life. After retirement your most of the time during the day will be spent with your spouse. There are instances where interpersonal relationship with spouse gets deteriorated after retirement mostly due to not giving enough personal space after retirement. Further, instead of helping spouse in domestic work many persons start supervising the work after retirement and start giving unnecessary suggestions in connection with the work. Your spouse may feel uncomfortable with your supervision and suggestions since before your retirement she was in the habit of doing work independently without your supervision and suggestions. Instead of supervising extend your helping hand to your spouse in carrying out domestic work. After retirement your presence in home should not be boring but interesting to her. Develop the habit of listening more to your spouse instead of speaking more. Many persons share their experiences during working life to spouse which is not at all interesting to her. Instead of telling working life experiences talk about enjoyable moment in your life in which your spouse was also involved. After leading a long journey of togetherness with your spouse there are lot of real stories on you and your spouse which you can share in your spare time. Cherish good memories together. Never come in the way of personal freedom of your spouse. 

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3.2 With Family Members: 

After spouse the interpersonal relationship with family members matter most. Family includes your spouse, parents, children, daughter-in-law, son-in-law and grandchildren. Challenges in maintaining interpersonal relationship with spouse have already been discussed in previous paragraph.                                                                                                                            After retirement very few persons are having both the parents living. In most of the cases they have either single living parent or no living parent. Your parent needs your attention and they expect caring attitude from you. Be sympathetic with them and take care of their health. You can spend more quality time with them which will make them happy.                                            

     

  For improving your interpersonal relationship with your young family members i.e., son, daughter, son-in-law and daughter-in-law one important thing should be kept in mind that they hardly have any free time during the day as they are busy in their professional life as well as family life. They are having very limited time to spend with you. Be empathetic with them and never expect much attention from them. You should interact with them for important things during their free time. Never interfere in their personal matters and never give them unnecessary advices.     

      If your children's family is staying with you or vice versa then you need to pay your special attention in maintaining good interpersonal relationship with your grandchildren. It is not at all difficult to maintain good interpersonal relationship with grandchildren. If your grandchildren are not at school going age then you can give maximum time to them and they will enjoy your company as they are not always getting the company of their parents due to engagement in their profession. You can build good interpersonal relationship with them by telling them good and interesting stories. Be like a child when you are in the company of your grandchildren. Play with them and enjoy their company. 

      If you are having your own house and your children are settled in another town or city then it is advisable to stay in your own house with your spouse instead of staying with your children. You can visit to their place when they call or invite you. If you are staying with your spouse in your own house then you can enjoy your life with more freedom and your relationship with your children will also be cordial. Frequent and unnecessary visit to Children's residence may spoil your interpersonal relationship with them.

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3.3 With Relatives: After retirement many persons try to rebuild relationship with their relatives as their bondage with relatives got weakened during their active working life because of too much engagement in professional and family life. Even many persons remained unconnected with their relatives during their active working life. It is hard reality for most of us. After retirement when our children get settled in their job or profession and staying away from us, we suddenly feel to re-establish contacts with our relatives. It became very difficult to again establish contacts with them after a long gap. There is a mental barrier which will not allow you to make a first call to them. Breaking ice is the main challenge in re-establishing contacts with relatives. However, if you want to re-establish contacts with them then you have to take initiative to break the ice by making a first call to them. You may not be knowing that they may also be in the same boat and are looking for re-establishing contact with you. Always talk about positive things whenever you are talking to your relatives, appreciate their good works and extend your helping hand to them in case of their needs. Never interfere in their personal and family matters and never allow them to interfere in your personal and family matters.

3.4 Friends: 

There is a drastic reduction in the number of friends after retirement due to cessation of working relationship with office colleagues. Out of 100 office colleagues hardly 8-10 will remain your friends. During our active working life most of us lost contacts with our school and college days friends due to involvement in professional and family life. Therefore, after retirement our friend circle become very limited. It is therefore necessary to build strong bondage with our existing limited friends. It is useless to visit office frequently to develop interpersonal relationship with your ex-colleagues. Please remember, your presence in the office after retirement is not welcomed in true sense. Even if there is a need to visit office due to your personal work relating to your pension, etc., restrict your visit to the Department dealing with your personal work and thereafter for your relaxation and taking snacks go to cafeteria or office canteen where you can meet your ex-colleagues. Never meet your ex- colleagues by making visit to their place of work. Even if you want to meet any of your ex-colleagues make appointment as per their convenience and meet them in cafeteria or office canteen. If your ex-office colleague is really interested in you, he or she will definitely meet you in the canteen. Do not bother at all even if they don't meet because you have visited office for your personal work and not with the intention of meeting them.  

            It is better to strengthen your bondage with your limited friends who are really interested in you. Strengthen relationship with your limited friends but keep touch with many known people as you don't know any of them may come forward for your help during your crisis or you may also be helpful to them during their crisis. 

3.5 Neighbours: Maintaining interpersonal relationship with neighbours is also important. One can choose friends but one cannot choose neighbours. If you want to change neighbours then you have to change your residence. Privacy and other issues relating to residence like common boundary, common wall, etc. may raise certain disputes with your neighbours. Such disputes are big barrier in maintaining healthy interpersonal relationship with neighbours. One thing everyone should keep in mind that in case of any emergent situation which needs immediate attention, the nearest person to whom you can approach is your neighbour. Therefore, it is very much essential to have cordial relationship with your neighbours so that you can feel free to seek their help in case of emergency. If there is any issue with your neighbour you can solve it by mutual discussion over a cup of tea or coffee. There is no issue in the World which cannot be solved across the table. 

4. Conclusion: Your post retirement life will be happy and peaceful if you are having good interpersonal relationship with the persons in your regular contacts. Good interpersonal relationship will give you peace of mind which will be helpful in improving your mental health. For maintaining good interpersonal relationship with the persons, you should have complete control over your words i.e., the words coming out of your mouth should not hurt the other person. Avoid too much intermingling with the person as it may spoil your interpersonal relationship.  Always appreciate your spouse, family members, friends and relatives for their good work. Never talk negative things with any person. Always have a smiling face whenever you are meeting any person. Smiling face is not only helpful in maintaining good interpersonal relationship but also helpful in making new friends. Thus, smiling face with positive mindset and proper choice of words while speaking will be helpful in developing good interpersonal relationship with any person. 

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Interpersonal Relationship

We often talk about interpersonal relationship whether we are in home, workplace, social events, sports, etc. In general, the question of interpersonal relationship comes whenever any work is required to be carried out by involving two or more persons. Interpersonal relationship is nothing but the relationship between two or more persons. Now-a-days, everywhere whether in Government Departments, Public Sector Undertakings, corporate sectors, educational institutions, social organisations, etc. inter personal relationship is given due importance. Why much importance is given to inter personal relationship? We will discuss in details about interpersonal relationship.

 2. Interpersonal relationship is developed whenever two or more persons are in communication with each other. That communication may be due to family relationship, working relationship, social relationship or any other relationship. Our first interpersonal relationship starts with our mother just after birth through non-verbal cues and gestures. Interpersonal relationship of every individual starts from family. We are all having interpersonal relationship with other individuals in family, school, neighbourhood, place of work, etc.

3. Interpersonal relationship is very important in every sphere of our life. Good interpersonal relationship between family members creates peaceful and healthy atmosphere in home which is required for the overall development of an individual. Good interpersonal relationship between the employees in workplace creates proper working environment by fostering mutual trusts and cooperation. Good interpersonal relationship in workplace develops team spirit which is essential for the achievement of goal of the organisation. Sharing of information fosters collaboration and develop communication within the team which is possible by having good interpersonal relationship between the team members. Good interpersonal relationship in neighbourhood and society creates an atmosphere of peace and harmony.

4. Why importance is given to interpersonal relationship? Is it possible to complete any project without any interpersonal relationship? There cannot be any project without the involvement of human beings. Human beings are social animals and therefore interpersonal relationship is automatically developed whenever they come closer for any purpose. Good interpersonal relationship helps in creating an atmosphere of mutual understanding and trust which is very much essential for the accomplishment of any task or completion of any project. It also breeds cooperation and opens up informal channel of communication which is required for obtaining honest feedback. Through informal channel of communication many information can be gathered which otherwise is very difficult or time consuming through formal communication.

   5. It is important for everyone to improve interpersonal relationship with other persons. But the question is how to improve interpersonal relationship? Good communication skill is required for improving interpersonal relationship. Good communication skill not only includes speaking but also patience listening. Only talking to other person without listening not only makes the communication incomplete but also hurt the feelings of another person. Lack of communication as well as miscommunication spoils interpersonal relationship. For good interpersonal relationship one should bury their egos. Ego is a big barrier to communication and spoils interpersonal relationship. For developing good interpersonal relationship, one should have genuine concern for other persons. Mutual respect for each other improves interpersonal relationship between the persons. If you want to maintain and improve interpersonal relationship then never ever ridicule or put down any person. It has been observed that in workplace may times one ridicule or put down his or her subordinated for not delivering as per his or her expectation. This spoils interpersonal relationship with that person. Interpersonal relationship with subordinates is also essential for the achievement of goal of the organisation. If your subordinate is not delivering as per your expectation then you need to handle it professionally by finding out the reasons for underperformance and accordingly counselling or coaching that person for making improvement in his or her performance. Focus should be on making improvement in the person which can be done by maintaining good interpersonal relationship and not by ridiculing that person. Never treat your team members as subordinates but instead treat them as your partners or colleagues. One should know to respect the other person’s view or opinion in both the cases of agreement as well as disagreement. One cannot develop good interpersonal relationship by disrespecting the view or opinion of another person. But it does not mean that for maintaining good interpersonal relationship one should always be in agreement with other person’s opinion. There are ways of communicating disagreement politely by giving due respect to one’s opinion. Before communicating disagreement, one should express gratitude for giving opinion and also communicate the points of agreement which will not only highlight one’s unbiased view to another person’s opinion but also professionalism in handling disagreement. 

 

6.   Good interpersonal relationship creates an atmosphere of peace and harmony in family, society, workplace, community and everywhere. Good interpersonal relationship reduces stress and acts as a good energy booster. It is having positive impact on our mental and physical health and gives peace of mind. It creates positivity and helps in finding out solution to every problem. Good interpersonal relationship helps in better negotiation with other persons. Good interpersonal relationship encourages the team members to go extra mile for the achievement of organisational goal. Cordial interpersonal relationship creates a win-win situation. A good leader always believes in cooperation rather than competition. Co-operation within the team can be built by maintaining cordial relationship between team members. Good interpersonal relationship develops trusts and co-operation within the team.

  7. We have discussed about the advantages of good interpersonal relationship. Let us see what are the disadvantages of poor interpersonal relationship. Poor interpersonal relationship between persons creates animosity between the persons which led to increase in stress. Any stressful situation adversely affects the mental and physical health of an individual. Poor interpersonal relationship between the persons in any organisation creates an atmosphere of fear, mistrusts, unhealthy competition and non-cooperation which ultimately affects productivity of that organisation. Such an atmosphere in any organisation is not ideal for achieving organisational goal. One cannot be a good negotiator with poor interpersonal skill. Poor interpersonal relationship creates lose-lose situation instead of a win-win situation.

     8. We all understood that there is no alternative to good interpersonal relationship. We need to develop good interpersonal relationship with everyone with whom we are in contact by using our soft skill. This will not only help in the development of an individual but also help in the development of entity, organisation, society, nation and the world. So let us start developing good interpersonal relationship with everyone in our contact starting from our family members. 

Active and Happy Retirement: Various Ways

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Retirement is a major transition in one's life as one has to move from active working life to leisure and relaxing life. This poses new challenges to many retirees regarding spending time meaningfully after retirement. One's active and happy retirement life depends on spending time meaningfully and remaining active after retirement.

1. Why one should remain active and happy after retirement?

If a person is not active after retirement it may lead to both mental and physical problem. Inactiveness after retirement increases risk of heart diseases, obesity, metabolic syndrome, diabetes and many other diseases. Prolonged inactiveness may lead a person to depression. Inactiveness may bring frustration and anxiety in one's mind. Therefore, it is essential for every retired person to remain active and happy so as to remain fit both physically and mentally. One can enjoy retirement life for a longer time if remains active and happy.

2. Ways to stay active after retirement:

Retirement is a transition from active working life to leisure and relaxing life. In this transition your long working hours are replaced with days which you can spend relaxing and doing the things of your liking. During this phase of life all the twenty-four hours in a day are at your disposal. It is up to you how you utilise it judiciously for your betterment and to keep yourself active and fit. There are various ways to keep yourself active after retirement. One can choose any two or three ways to stay active and happy. 

2.1 Physical Exercises: 

Physical exercise is a good way to stay active after retirement.  Daily morning walk for at least 30-45 minutes in a day will keep your blood circulation proper. It will help you to live independently as you age. Make your exercise plan that suits your schedule. Focus on the exercises that improves your metabolism, flexibility, strength and balance. Never do heavy exercise at this age. Exercise should be light and suits your body requirement. If you are having any medical problem then concern your doctor before developing your schedule for exercise. Walking and swimming are good exercises. 

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2.2 Cooking: 

Cooking food can be developed as a passion after retirement. One can learn cooking various types of recipes from internet and YouTube. Cooking as a hobby is helpful in combating feeling of loneliness in addition to keeping you fit and active. Homemade food is much healthier than processed food purchased from eating outlets or supermarkets. Further, while cooking food you can ensure its low calories content and more nutrients. Maintaining hygiene and ensuring food safety is under your control if you cook food yourself in home.  

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2.3 Gardening: 

Gardening can be developed as a passion because it benefits both you and and the environment in several ways. Gardening helps you in growing beautiful flowers which gives you mental satisfaction while showing it to your guests. It helps you in growing vegetables and fruits by using the technique of organic farming which gives you many health benefit. It is also good for environment as consuming home-grown food helps you in reducing your personal carbon footprint. The plants grown in your garden consumes carbon dioxide and releases oxygen and thereby helpful in preventing global warming. Gardening keeps you fit and active as it involves manual work which keeps you moving and you can reap the benefit of exposure to the sun which helps your body in absorbing vitamin D from sunlight. 

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2.4 Manage Your Money: 

Managing your own money can be your regular activity after retirement. Managing money after retirement is a very important activity because of dependence on passive income i.e., pension, interest, dividend, rent, etc. Without managing money, you cannot maintain your retirement life happy for a longer time. Since all the necessary expenses after retirement are met out of passive income which is almost fixed it is therefore necessary to make financial planning in such a way so as to increase your passive income to take care of inflation and increase in medical and other expenses as you age. You need to track flow of income and expenditure incurred during the month. You need to make monthly budget for your expected expenditure and plan for regular monthly saving and investment for growing your retirement corpus as well as passive income. 

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2.5 Do Brain Exercises: 

We utilised our mental faculty during our student life and working life mostly out of compulsion. But during retirement life there is hardly any such compulsion to use our mental faculty and there is hardly any scope for it. Therefore, it is essential to do certain brain exercises on a regular basis to hone our mental sharpness, boosting our memories, concentration and focus. Playing chess, puzzle solving games, building vocabulary, learning new language, meditation, etc., are certain brain exercises which one can do during retirement life to keep mental health in sound condition which is required for leading active and happy retirement life. 

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2.6 Stay Socially Connected: 

Man is a social animal and therefore need to be connected to other human beings is already programmed in our DNA. It is therefore essential to re-establish your old connections and built new social connection with other persons. Strengthen your social connection with your friends, family and neighbours. Social connection boosts your self-esteem and confidence. Social connection helps in keeping your mental and physical health in sound condition. It helps in bringing down your level of stress, anxiety and depression. It also helps in maintaining your cardiovascular system in good condition and having sound sleep during night. 

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2.7 Have a Sound Night Sleep: 

Sound sleep of 7-8 hours during night is required for keeping you fresh and lively for the whole day. Sound sleep helps in repairing your damaged tissue and enhance healing process. It helps in keeping you fit both mentally and physically. To have a sound sleep during night you have to do physical exercises and physical activities during day time and keep yourself detached from electronic gadgets at least 20 minutes before going to bed. 

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2.8 Travelling: 

Travelling is a good activity after retirement. One should have a budget for short distance, long distance and overseas tour. Travel after retirement is more enjoyable as you are free from working life stress and from many other responsibilities. Travelling is having many benefits. It makes us happy and relieves stress and anxiety. Travelling takes us out of comfort zone and helps us in overcoming the feeling of loneliness. Travelling after retirement helps us in knowing the World in different perspective. Your joy for travel starts from the stage of planning and preparation and last for a month after coming back to home. After coming back from travel, you get pleasure while sharing your experience to your friends and family members. It will also give you pleasure in future while cherishing memories of travel with your family and friends. 

         

3. Proper retirement planning during active working life is required for smooth moving of your retirement life without any financial problem. Staying active and happy during retirement life is also equally important for which few ways are suggested above. Retirement life is a blessing of God and therefore live it by remaining active and happy during the rest of your life. 

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