Senior Citizens – Issue of Socialization

 

Senior Citizens – Issue of Socialization

We all know regarding the various challenges that a senior citizen faces of which the most serious challenge is lack of socialization. After the completion of working life, a senior citizen faces the challenges of lack of engagement and socialization. Challenge of engagement can be mitigated by pursuing hobbies, reading books, helping spouse in domestic work, etc., for which one may not need another person’s help. But to mitigate the challenge of socialization one need other persons for interaction. Without interactions with other persons, one cannot mitigate the challenge of socialization. Therefore, there is a necessity to have regular chit chat with a group of senior citizens.

2. With the increase in age, a senior citizen faces a gradual reduction in the number of persons for interaction within home as well as in social circle. After retirement, there is a sudden reduction in number of persons for interactions due to cease of working relationship with colleagues. Most of the senior citizens have adult children busy with their profession and family life and may not be staying with them. Therefore, they hardly get a scope for interacting with people including family members. Therefore, there is a necessity to form a group of senior citizens residing in the same locality to have frequent chit chat with each other. 

3. Every senior citizen is having a stock of experiences and knowledge acquired during the course of journey of their life which they want to share with someone. A group of 10 to 15 persons is an ideal size for having a chit chat. In a large size group, all the senior citizens may not get a scope to share his or her thoughts and opinions. If a group is too small then the participants may not get enriched with the diversified views on the subject matter. It is better to have a group size of 10-15 persons staying in the same or nearby locality having diversified backgrounds i.e. having experiences in various fields and from different professions. It is better to have a group having persons from diversified cultural backgrounds. The purpose is to have divergent views on the subject matter which helps in widening our horizon of thoughts.

4.  The chit chat may be informal or formal. Informal chit chats are more frequently held in common places like club house of housing society, garden, etc. Generally informal chit chats are on daily basis in which everyone shares their problems, day-to-day experiences, important information helpful to all, etc. There may not be any fixed topic for such informal chit chat. Sometimes chit chat starts spontaneously by the persons on certain occasions like marriage ceremony, birthday party, etc.

In a formal chit chat, there is a fixed topic for discussion. Formal chit chats are generally preplanned and topics for discussion are decided well in advance. Date and timing are also decided well in advance and informed to all the participants. Such formal chit chat requires strong initiative by at least one interested person.

5. Organizing meeting for chit chat: The success of any meeting whether formal or informal depends on the way the meeting has been conducted. The meeting should be conducted in such a manner that every participant gets a chance to share his or her viewpoints or opinions on the subject and meeting should end within a reasonable time with important takeaways. If a meeting is informal then everyone should take care to allow others to speak and wait for their turn to speak. Depending on the number of persons and the expected duration of a meeting, one should decide the timing for each participant to speak. Successful meeting ends within a reasonable time with logical conclusion. Successful meeting helps in enriching the participants with important takeaway. 

6. Subject matters during chit chat: Generally informal chit chat does not have any pre decided subject matters for discussion. Subject matters evolved during the course of discussion during chit chat. If the same set up of senior citizens are meeting on daily basis, then care should be taken to have discussion on variety of subjects and not to repeat the same subject on every occasion otherwise persons may lose interest in chit chat. Please take care to avoid discussion on any controversial topic which may heart the sentiment of any other person. The topic should be interesting and of general interest to all. Discussion on serious topics of technical in nature may be discussed in formal meetings of senior citizens. Formal meeting should be organized after informing timing, venue and subject matter to the participants well in advance so that participants interested to deliberate on the subject matter may have sufficient time for preparation. It is better to have discussions on the subject matters related to general health and hygiene, finance, peace of mind, managing relationships, philosophy of life, etc. There are lot of subject matters in addition to these on which one may have discussion.

7. No doubt that the subject matter for discussion is very important but the more important is the way of conducting meeting for making the discussion healthy and enriching. It was observed that despite having interesting subject matter the participants are not getting interest and could not enrich themselves from the meeting. Thumb rule for making the meeting successful is that every person during the chit chat should be allowed to speak and all other should listen to the person speaking. It was observed that all the persons are eager to speak and many times all start speaking simultaneously without listening to anyone. Such meetings end in chaos making everyone unhappy. There should be one person taking leading role in conducting meeting. That person should give brief introduction of the subject matter for discussion and should fix time for each person to speak. The person speaking should focus on the subject matter. No other person should talk or interrupt in between when a person is speaking. The other person should listen to that person attentively and if there is any point of disagreement then it should be raised after that person finishes his talk. While raising point of disagreement care should be taken not to hurt the sentiment of the speaker. It should be raised in a polite manner without hurting anyone. Everyone should try to finish within allotted time so as to give chance to others to speak.  

8. Socialization is very important during every phase of our life but a person faces the challenge of socialization during the second innings of life. During this phase, a person requires someone to interact with. Since every senior citizen is facing this problem, it is therefore essential to form a group of senior citizens for frequent interactions with each which will serve the purpose of socialization. Let us come together to socialize with each other and enrich ourselves with various information and thoughts shared by everyone during chit-chat. Let us together make our journey of life meaningful and joyful. 

#Socialization

 

Promises to Self

In one of my articles ‘How to make post-retirement life happy and fruitful?’ I mentioned that the foremost reason for happiness during post-retirement life is not having any boss and all the 24 hours in a day are at our disposal. But the question is how many persons during their post- retirement life are utilizing their time in a fruitful manner to pursue their hobbies and to achieve their goals set during their post-retirement life. You will find that very few persons are utilizing their time in a fruitful manner.

2. The question is why many persons are not able to utilize their time in a fruitful manner? The answer lies in the second paragraph of my article ‘How to make post-retirement life happy and fruitful?’ in which there is a mention about the absence of boss during post-retirement life. Since we have spent 30-35 years of our life in working under the direction of boss, we could not develop the habit of working on our own. You will not be surprised to know that many persons could not set their goals during their post-retirement life. They do not have any objective for the rest of their life.

3. To make the post-retirement life purposeful and fruitful one need to find out the purpose and objectives for their rest of the life. In addition, one is required to set their goals with definite timeframe for its achievement. You know whenever we make promise to someone, we try to fulfil it. If one is making promise to spouse, then definitely all the efforts are made to fulfil that promise. It is therefore advisable to make a promise to spouse regarding achievement of your goal within the targeted date. You may also make a promise to yourself regarding achievement of your goal. Develop the habit of making promises to self for the achievement of your goals. After making a promise to self, ask yourself about the progress made in fulfilling your promise. Constant reminder to self about the promise made will help you in achieving your goal. Mere promise will not help in achieving your goal. It needs continuous follow up with the self.

4. Promise to self is important not only during the second innings of life but also during all the stages of our life. In paragraph 4 of my article ‘Talking to Self’, I have mentioned that the self-talk can be effectively used for the achievement of goals. Whenever you are making promises to self you are talking to self. During your working life you were accountable to your boss regarding your performance. Absence of boss during post-retirement life makes us unaccountable. Therefore, it is very much essential to make ourselves boss for our own performances i.e. to make ourselves our own boss. Therefore, it is advisable to be your own boss and make accountable to yourself by making promises to self.  

5. How to make your self-promises effective in achieving your goals? The success rate of fulfilment of your self-promise depends on the degree of emotional attachment to it. Therefore, after making promise to self, develop emotional attachment to it. More you make emotional attachment the chances of its fulfilment increases. Have a picture or rough sketch of your promise to make it concrete and place it in your bedroom or any other convenient place in your home to make it easily visible to you. If you are not able to picturize your promise, then you can write it in bold and big letters on a sheet of paper. See the picture or writing at least once in the morning and once before going to bed for sleep every day. Daily visualization of it day and night will make your subconscious mind to work for its fulfilment and automatically all your thoughts and actions will be channelized in the direction of achieving your goal. In addition, it is very much essential to formulate your action points for the fulfilment of your promise made to self. Initiate action and frequently monitor its progress. In this way you can make your self-promises effective in achieving your goals.

6. We are in this material world for a very limited time period. There should be some purpose in our life. Find out some purpose in your life which will drive and motivate you to lead the life happily. Make a promise to self to create happiness and positivity in your mind. Make a promise to spread positivity and happiness to your near and dear as well as to your neighborhoods and society. Make a promise to self to be helpful, caring and kind to others. Make a promise to self to make yourself a good human being and to have positive contribution to the society and mankind. Let us hope that by making the above promises to self we can make our society as well as this planet a better place to live.

Reference Links:

1. https://post-retirementlife.blogspot.com/2023/09/how-to-make-post-retirement-life-happy.html

2. https://post-retirementlife.blogspot.com/2023/12/talking-to-self.html

 Setting Goals in Life

Goal setting is very important not only for an organization but also for an individual. Setting goals in life helps in developing a roadmap to fulfil dreams during various stages of life. You may wonder why I am discussing about goal settings in life during various stages of life when we senior citizens are in the last phase of life. What is its utility to senior citizens? If any senior citizen is thinking like that, he is not wrong since at this stage we cannot set our goals retrospectively. During this phase of life, we have a lot of old memories related to both achievements and failures in life. No doubt, one feels pleasure in cherishing old memories of pleasant moments and experiences of successes in life, but it is very difficult to cherish memories of failures in life. Many senior citizens repent for their failures in past. But instead of repenting, it is better to learn lessons from past failures which will be helpful in giving proper guidance to the upcoming generation for achieving their goals and fulfilment of their dreams. 

2.  For achieving dream, one need to do the followings.

(i)             Setting Goals

(ii)           Developing Strategies to achieve Goals

(iii)         Taking initiatives and actions based on strategies

(iv)          Review of actions taken

2.1 Setting Goals: Setting Goal is the first and foremost step for the achievement of dream. Goals in life differ during various phases of life.  During student life a person is mostly having academic goal and near the end of student life one may have professional goal in addition to academic goal. During working life, a person is mostly having professional and financial goals. During initial stage of working life, one may have a goal to settle in life and to have a family. After the completion of working life when a person enters into post-retirement life, goals are totally different due to drastic change in lifestyle and priorities after retirement. During post-retirement life focus is more on stability and therefore a person’s financial goal is mostly to have consistent flow of passive income so as to take care of one’s daily needs, medical expenditure and leisure travels by making proper placement of retirement corpus in various financial instruments. Peace of mind with sound health become priority at this stage. I am not going into the details of goal settings for which I may have to write a separate article.  Goals should be SMART i.e., specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time bound.

2.2 Developing Strategies to achieve Goals: Once a goal is set there is a need to develop strategies to achieve the goal. Before developing strategies, one should set the timeline for the achievement of goal, and it should be achievable within the timeline. While developing strategies one should take the stock of available resources which includes available information, tools and other material resources required for the achievement of goal. Once you know the resources required for the achievement of goal, you can ascertain the resources gap to be fulfilled. Strategy includes the following steps.

(i) Identification of resources required for the achievement of goal.

(ii) Ascertaining the resources gap to be fulfilled.

(iii) Developing action points to fill the resources gap.

(iv) Developing various milestones in a chronological order for the achievement of goal.

(v) Creating action points for the achievement of each and every milestone with deadlines.

2.3 Taking initiatives and actions based on strategies

This is the most important steps without which the first two steps will become useless. Even after having a noble goal with robust strategies, one may not achieve any success if there is a lack of initiatives and actions. It is very important to take initiative i.e., the first step and subsequent actions based on strategies. Action should be appropriate for achieving each and every milestone within the deadline. After achieving the first milestone one need to initiate action for moving towards the next milestone.

2.4 Review of actions taken

It is very important to review the actions after reaching every milestone. If you are not able to reach the milestone before targeted date or sure that your action is not taking you near the targeted date, then you should review your actions and find out the most appropriate way to reach the targeted date. Even after reaching the first milestone within the targeted date, one should review the actions taken for reaching the first milestone. On similar way review of actions should be made for each and every milestone. Review of your actions helps in finding out the most appropriate way to reach the milestone and in achieving your goal. It also helps in identifying irrelevant steps which can be removed for facilitating achievement of goal in a smooth manner within the targeted date.

3. Types of Goals

Goals are of various types based on its importance and tenure of achievement. Strategies for achieving goals may not be the same for every goal and may differ for each goal based on its type and nature. One need to prioritize the goals to be achieved as it may not be possible to work on the strategies for all the goals simultaneously.

3.1 Types of Goals based on importance

Based on its importance, goals are of three types.

(i) The Most Important Goal

(ii) Important Goal

(iii) Least Important Goal

Based on the degree of importance one need to prioritize the goals. The most important goal should always be on one’s top priority. But it does not mean that one should not focus on the least important goal. One need to develop the strategies for the achievement of each and every goal, but action should be first initiated for the most important goal and more efforts should be made for its achievement. Not necessarily your lifetime goal may be the most important goal during each and every phase of your life. For example, at the age of 25 years one may have a dream to have a farmhouse and accordingly a goal has been set to have it within the next 15 years. But to have a job for livelihood is also a goal that gains importance over long term goal of having farmhouse because without livelihood it may not be possible to have a dream farmhouse. Accordingly, one need to prioritize one’s goal. Many times, achievement of one’s long- term goal depends on the achievement of short-term goal.  

3.2 Types of Goals based on tenure

Based on time required for the achievement of goals, we may categorize the goals into three types.

(i) Short Term Goals

(ii) Medium Term Goals

(iii) Long Term Goals

A short-term goal requires a time span of one to two years for its achievement. A medium-term goal requires three to five years whereas a long-term goal takes at least 10 years for its achievement. These time periods are flexible. Persons of young and middle age groups can have the scope for short term, medium term and long-term goals. Whereas persons in old age group have very little scope for long term goals.

4. Goal Setting during post-retirement life

Setting of goals in life is not only important during earlier phases of life but is also important during post-retirement life though there is a very little scope for setting long-term goals during this phase of life. One can have mostly short-term goals and rarely mid-term goals during this phase of life. Pursuing hobbies, planning for travel, having celebrations, planning events, etc., maybe one’s goal during this phase of life. Still there are possibilities of achieving unfulfilled dream during this phase of life.  

5. Evaluating reasons for failures in achieving goals during past

On recapitulation of old memories, one may have complete picture of both achievement and non-achievement of goals set during earlier phases of life. No doubt one will have pleasure in cherishing the memories related to goals successfully achieved in life but is equally important to analyze the reasons for failure in achieving certain goals in life.  On introspection, one may come to know the reasons for non-achievement of goals. Instead of blaming others it is better to own the responsibility for failures in past. In most cases the main reason for failure is lack of commitment and focus. Due to lack of commitment, a person fails to develop the strategies for achieving goal and many times lose focus on goal. In case of particularly long-term goal, tendency to lose focus is more due to intermittent distractions which may be due to events and incidents happening in between. Most of the events and incidents are not in our control, but the only thing that is in our control is our response and reactions towards such events and incidents. Incidents and events are momentary in our life, but our response and reaction are not momentary and carried for longer duration which leads to distraction from our main goal. It is our responsibility to have control over our reactions and not allowing it to be carried for longer period. Giving undue importance to the opinions of other persons regarding our goal also lead to distractions.

6. Conclusion

Senior Citizens have experiences of both successes and failures in life which may help them to prepare learning points which will be helpful in providing guidance to the upcoming generations for achievement of their goals successfully without repeating the mistakes already done in the pasts. 

Tour During Post-Retirement Life

 

Tour During Post-Retirement Life

In my earlier post “How to make post-retirement life happy and fruitful?” I have mentioned that during this phase of life one is free to plan vacation tour (rather I will say leisure tour) any time as per one’s convenience. I also suggested for leisure tour at reasonable frequency with spouse. Therefore, you will find previous four posts in my blog on my tour to Jaipur, Udaipur, Mount Abu and Thar Deserts in Rajasthan, India. You will also find posts on my tour to Digha, West Bengal, India and Puri, Odisha, India. Very recently I have also made a short distance tour to Shantiniketan, West Bengal, India which is at a distance of about 180 kilometers from my home. I have not yet posted any article on my tour to Shantiniketan. 

2. What should be the frequency of tour? It depends on many factors. Leisure travel may be short distance tour or long-distance tour, may be domestic or international. Short distance tours are generally of short duration. One may have such short duration tour to the nearest destinations on more frequent intervals, which may be once in a quarter. The frequency of short duration and short distance tour depends on one’s financial strength as well as health condition. Long duration and long-distance tour may be conducted at half yearly or yearly interval, depending on one’s health condition (both physical and financial).

3. Planning of tour is an essential element for making your tour enjoyable as well as cost effective. For long distance tour it is better to plan two to three months in advance which will help you in finding cheap flight tickets and hotels at reasonable prices. Planning in advance will help you in preparing your itinerary after making detail study of the places of interests, available transport facilities at the destinations, eateries, etc. For short distance tour planning 15 to 30 days in advance is sufficient. It is better to gather information on places of interests in and around your destination including study of map with routes which will help you in planning your tour in a more effective way. While making tour plan it is very important to keep sufficient timing for each and every spot as well as sufficient travel time between the two spots. It is advisable not to make your itinerary too hectic.

4. One has to ensure the followings before leaving home for leisure tour.

(i) Luggage should be light weighted containing all the essential items to be carried during your tour. It is better to carry trolley bag instead of suitcase as trolley bag is having wheels which can be easily moved from one place to another without lifting.

(ii) Please ensure that you have carried all your essential medicines with you including some other medicines and ointments to be used in case of exigencies. Have a first-aid box with you.

(iii) While packing your luggage please ensure that all your essential items are taken leaving sufficient room for accommodating items which you may purchase at the tourist destinations. While packing your luggage please ensure ‘space for everything and everything in its place’ so that you can easily trace any item as and when required. To make space for everything carry the essential and daily need items in small quantities sufficient to fulfil your requirement during tour. For example, instead of carrying 200-gram toothpaste you can carry 50-gram toothpaste, instead of carrying shampoo bottle you can carry shampoo sachets, etc.

(iv)  Carry all your travel documents including air tickets, passport, etc. in your handbag. Carry all your essential medicines and items required during travel in your handbag. Keep travel documents handy as these are required to be shown at airport.

(v) Before leaving your home please ensure that all your electrical gadgets are switched off, water taps are closed, and regulator of your cooking gas is in off mode. Ensure locking of your cupboards, almirahs and rooms. The last but not the least is that the proper locking of main door of your home should be ensured before leaving.  

5. After proceeding for tour ensure visiting all the places as per your travel plan or itinerary. Take photographs and videos during tour which will help in cherishing your memories after finishing your tour. Please do not post your videos and photos in social media during your tour. It is advisable to posts videos and photos in social media after coming back to your home.

6. I hope the above tips will help you in making your tour enjoyable and memorable forever.

 Bicycle Riding - A Good Activity During Post Retirement Life

1. The bicycle was invented over 200 years ago and has been a major mode of transport for 140 years. Cycling is one of the best exercises for persons of all age groups i.e., from 5 years to 80+ years of age under normal health conditions. Even during old age one can continue to do cycling. One never forgets cycling once learned. Cycling is not only exercise but is also a mode of transport for short distance travel which is not only cheap but also pollution free. Parking of cycle is very easy as it does not require much space for parking.  One can do cycling on a very narrow trackway. Let us discuss about the best timing for cycling, safety measures to be taken during cycling, benefits of cycling and steps taken by few countries to promote cycling.

  2. Best Timing for Cycling: You can do cycling anytime of the day as per your convenience and comfort. But in Tropical Countries it is better to do cycling in the early morning because morning whether is comfortable and sun is less intense compared to other part of the day. Cycling in the morning is preferable because one can breathe fresh natural air and the traffic is less on the road compared to other part of the day. Riding is safer during morning. Morning ride increases your blood circulation which makes you feel fresher. Morning ride also improves your work efficiency. If you are having busy schedules during morning, then you can prefer to do cycling during evening hours when the intensity of the Sun is low.

3. Safety measures to be taken during cycling: Risk of accident is there in cycling which may cause injury. Therefore it is essential to take certain safety measures while riding a bicycle. Following safety measures are suggested for safe cycling.

(i) Wear a properly fitted helmet while riding bicycle as helmet can protect your head from injury if you fall from bicycle due to accident. 

(ii) Install a rearview mirrors on handlebars of bicycle to see the movement of traffic behind you. While changing your lane or direction please observe the movement of traffic behind you so that you can change the lane or direction safely. Before changing lane give indication well in advance to alert the traffic behind you.

(iii) Never ride with headphones. Never talk on mobile phone while riding bicycle as it may divert your attention from road traffic which may cause accident.  

(iv) Ride your bicycle on lane earmarked for riding bicycle. If bicycle lane is not earmarked, then prefer to ride bicycle on the side of the road where traffic is less without disturbing the pedestrians.  

(v) Wear reflective materials while riding bicycle on road so as to increase your visibility to the drivers of other vehicles on the road. This will reduce the risk of accidents on road.

(vi) Before riding the bicycle check the various parts and equipment of your bicycle. Ensure that your tires are properly inflated and breaks are in proper conditions. Also ensure that your chains and gears are in proper conditions and without any defect. 

(vii) Always keep your hands on handlebars of your bicycle so that you can have full control over the movement of your bicycle while riding. 

(viii) While riding bicycle on the road follow the traffic rules and make use of hand signals whenever and wherever necessary. 

4. Benefits of Cycling: Cycling is a low-cost vehicle which is pollution free as well as can be used as a physical fitness tool. Cycling is good for maintaining physical fitness. The benefits of cycling are detailed hereunder.

(i) We all know that the risk of heart disease increases with the increase in age. Cycling is a low-impact aerobic exercise that improves our cardiovascular fitness and strengthen heart muscle.

(ii) Cycling enhances blood circulation. It also reduces the risk of cancer , diabetes and kidney disease. 

(iii) Cycling helps in burning fats and building muscle especially in our legs and hips. It helps in improving our stamina.

(iv) Regular cycling helps in preserving balance and coordination. It also improve lower-body function which prevent us from falling. 

(v) Cycling helps in strengthening and protecting our joints. Regular cycling helps in preventing knee joint pain which is very common in old age.

(vi) Cycling helps in boosting our mental health. The risk of cognitive degenerative deceases increases with age which can lead to depression and anxiety. Riding bicycle outside in an open air during morning refresh your mind and also give you fresh air and good dose of vitamin D which helps in improving your mood and reducing stress level. Vitamin D is required for absorption of calcium which helps in improving bone density. 

(vii) Cycling helps in strengthening our immune system that reduces the chances of getting sick. 

(viii) During pandemic due to spread of corona virus, bicycle was the safest mode of transport due to lesser risk of infection as compared to public transport. 

5. The General Assembly of the United Nations (UN) has come out with a resolution in Favour of cycling and urged countries to promote everyday cycling. European Parliament has taken a policy decision to promote cycling within the countries in Europe and aims to double cycling in Europe by 2030. They are going to increase investment in safe, separated cycling infrastructure and integrate cycling into urban framework. Copenhagen, Denmark is known as the best city in Europe for cycling. For making Germany more bike friendly, the National cycling Plan (NCP) 3.0 was launched in 2021 to boost cycling and making it more attractive and safer. The first National Cycling Plan (NCP) was launched in 2002.

In some European Union countries, there is a system of placing bicycle inside public transport i.e., trains, regional buses and trams so as to enable people to travel from door -to -door over longer distances by combining public transport with cycling. Such measures reduce the use of car to travel long distances in Europe which helps in reducing carbon emission. In some European countries backside racks on buses have been introduced so that a greater number of bicycles can be carried in such buses. 

6. Cycling is good for all age groups starting from the age of five. Our activities get reduced after retirement as we do not have nine to five schedules that we had during working life. To live a long and healthy life it is necessary to have some physical as well as mental activities. Bicycle riding is a good option for both physical activity and mental pleasure. If you have any severe medical problem, then take the advice of your doctor before starting bicycle riding. Chose bicycle which will suit your physique and comfort.  Bicycle riding is not only good for our physical and mental health but also good for our environment. 

    

 How to make post-retirement life happy and fruitful?

  

Why many persons are not happy during their post-retirement life despite having financial freedom and having no liability towards their children. Even after achieving most of the things in life and free from financial problems, persons are not happy. Let us find out the reasons why many persons are not happy during their post-retirement life.   

Let us find out the reasons for happiness: 

Before finding out the reasons for unhappiness let us find out the reasons why the persons should be happier during their post-retirement life. 

(i) The foremost reason for happiness is not having any Boss during post-retirement life. You are your own boss. You have all the 24 hours at your disposal which you can utilise as per your desires and convenience.

(ii) Another reason for happiness is reduction in stress level after retirement as you are free from job related stress during post-retirement life. 

(iii)  You are not answerable to anyone except yourself. During working life, you were answerable to your boss for your performance. You were even answerable to your client.

(iv)  During working life your plan for going to vacation tour was subjected to sanction of leave by your boss. You are now free to plan your vacation tour any time during the year as per your convenience. 

(v) You can choose to do any work as per your interest and liking which was not the case before retirement.

Reasons for Unhappiness During Post Retirement life: 

Despite having strong reasons for happiness why some persons are unhappy during post-retirement life? Generally, most of the unhappiness are mental and not due to external factors. Let us discuss the reasons why many persons are unhappy during their post-retirement life.

(i)  Having regret for non-achievement or under achievement during the past life is one of the main reasons for unhappiness. Many persons are having regret for not getting promotion, not getting reward for their performance, etc. Living in the past and continuously remembering the failures during past life makes a person unhappy in the present.

(ii)  Expectation of recognition and respects from ex-colleagues and other persons is another reason for unhappiness. Many persons expects that they should continue to get respect from their colleagues even after retirement. But that is not the reality. When a person does not get respect as per expectation, they become unhappy. 

(iii)  Many retired persons are in the habit of giving free advices to family members and friends. A person become unhappy when nobody listens to his or her advice. Habit of giving free advices invites unhappiness in one's life. 

(iv)  Spending most of the time in watching television also invites unhappiness. Watching news in television for long duration feeds negativity in our sub-conscious mind which ultimately creates unhappiness.

(v)  Excessive talking also leads to unhappiness. Many persons at this stage talk more about their own achievements during their student and working life which nobody want to listen. This creates frustration and unhappiness.

(vi)  Non utilisation or improper utilisation of free time due to lack of engagement is another reason for unhappiness. Lack of engagement creates negative thoughts in the mind which create unhappiness.

How to make your retirement life happy and fruitful? 

 If you have to make your retirement life happy and fruitful then you have to follow certain dos and don’ts. Let us first discuss about Do's and thereafter we will discuss about Don’ts. 

What you should do to make your retirement life happy and fruitful?

(i) Take Care of Your Health: It's very important to take care of your health. You can enjoy your post-retirement life if your health is in good condition. Health means not only your physical health but also your mental as well as spiritual health. Maintenance of your physical health is very much essential to do your day-to-day activities without any difficulties. It will reduce your dependency on other person and will help you in enjoying your vacation tour. As regards maintenance of good physical health, I have explained in details in my previous blog the link of which is given hereunder. You may click the link the following link to have details on maintaining good physical health during post-retirement life.

https://post-retirementlife.blogspot.com/2022/04/physical-health-during-second-innings.html

It is also very important to take care of your mental as well as spiritual health. Need for taking care of one's mental and spiritual health has been explained in my previous blogs the link of which are given hereunder.

(i) https://post-retirementlife.blogspot.com/2022/04/mental-health-during-second-innings-of.html

(ii) https://post-retirementlife.blogspot.com/2022/03/spiritual-health-during-second-innings.html

(ii) Develop Good Friend circle: It is very important to develop good friend circle near your surroundings. It is better to start developing friend circle well before your retirement so that you can have some friends after retirement for your socialisation. Friend Circle's composition should be diversified, both in terms of professional and cultural backgrounds so that you can enrich yourself with their wide experiences. Have a regular meeting and get together with them.

(iii) Have a vacation tour, picnic and other amusement: Plan for vacation tour at reasonable frequency with your spouse. Have both short tour and long tour at certain interval which is comfortable to you. At least once in a year you should go for picnic with your friends and family members. Have a visit to nearby museum, park and other amusement centres for your recreation. 

(iv) Make daily contribution to your life: Please make an endeavour to make value addition to your life. Please remember one thing that your scope for progress doesn’t stop on retirement date. There is a scope for progress even after retirement. There is always a scope for progress till you are alive. Ensure daily contribution to your life for making it meaningful. Extend your helping hand to your spouse in day-to-day routine household work. If you have a long-term plan for making some value addition to your life, ensure to make daily progress in that direction. For example, if you have decided to author a book which may take one- or two-years’ time to finish, then make a strategy to have a quarterly, monthly, weekly and daily target to ensure consistent efforts in the direction of your goal. 

(v) Pursue your hobby: Every person is having at least one hobby which one could not pursue during working or professional life. It is better to pursue your hobby during post-retirement life which will make your life happy and meaningful. It will also give you meaningful engagement.

(vi) Pay back to Society: From childhood to adult stage most of the investments were made for our personal development. During our working and professional life, we worked for our livelihood for the development and welfare of our family. This is the time to pay back to society when we don't have any liability towards our children and passive income is sufficient to take care of our expenditure. You may pay back to society by doing some charity or philanthropical work which will give you peace of mind. 

 

(vii) Mix with the persons of all age group: There is a general tendency of a person to mix with the persons of having same age group. It is advisable to mix with the persons of different age groups so that you can enrich yourself with the varieties of experiences of persons of different age groups. Persons of younger age group may also be benefitted by enriching themselves with your experiences. Mixing with young generation will abreast you with the latest development and trends in the society.

 (viii) Develop your listening skill: It has been observed that with the growing age a person is in the habit of talking more and listening less. Please develop the habit of talking less and listening more. Talking more without listening to other person antagonise the other person and you miss some useful information which that person wants to convey. If you talk less and patiently listen to other person then your image gets uplifted in the heart of that person and you get enrich with the information provided by that person. Please remember every person wants that he or she should be listened patiently by others. If you also want the same then you have to develop the habit of listening to others with patience. 

 What you should not do during post-retirement life 

(i)  Never give free advices to anyone even to your family members. If you are in the habit of giving free advices then you will be ignored and avoided by other persons including your family members. Such situation will bring unhappiness in your life. Never give advice to anyone unless someone seeks your advice.  

 (ii) Never permanently stay with your Children's family. Avoid staying with your Children's family because your independence may get compromised to some extent. If they request you to stay with them for some time which may be helpful to them then you may stay with them to extend your helping hand. During your stay with your Child's family maintain arm length distance and never interfere in their family matters. Give them their personal space so that you will also have the personal space for yourself.

 (iii) While talking to your children and grandchildren never say ‘during our time’ because today's time is also yours since you are living today. Live in present instead of living in the past. Never glorify past at the cost of present. There is a general tendency of many old age persons to glorify the things in the past and criticising the things in the present. Please remember that human civilisation progresses with the passage of time. With the passage of time human civilisation rectify the mistakes done in the past. Therefore, in general the present is always better than the pasts.

 (iv) Never visit your previous office for mere socialisation. If you do so you will get frustrated and demoralised. If you have any personal work for which you need to visit your previous office then you should restrict your visit to that purpose only. Please remember that in whatever position you might have been retired but your presence in the office after retirement is not welcomed. 

 (v) Never boast yourself in a friend circle about your position and importance in the office before retirement. Nobody is interested to know your position and importance in the office before retirement as we all know that the brand of a fused bulb is hardly matter to anyone. Please remember you will be judged in your friend circle based on your attitude and behaviour at present. 

 (vi) Never be overenthusiastic in knowing what is happening in the office after your retirement. I have seen some persons who are very enthusiastic to know what is happening in the office after their retirement, who got promotion, who did not get promotion, etc. These are none of your business. Your over enthusiasm to know the present happening in the office may diminish your image amongst your friends who are still working in the office.

 (vii) Never bother about the persons who are ignoring you. Instead of focussing on the persons who are ignoring you it is better to focus on your family members and friends who are taking care of you. Never give undue importance to the persons who are ignoring you. It is better to ignore such persons who are ignoring you.

By following certain dos and don’ts as explained above one can make post-retirement life happy and fruitful. 

Post Retirement Life - Various Stages and Challenges

Post Retirement Life -  Various Stages and Challenges

Life after retirement goes through the following four stages.                                                                (i) Honeymoon stage                                      

(ii) Active stage                                     

(iii)Disenchantment stage                    

(iv)Stability stage   

Let us discuss the challenges that a retiree faces during various stages and how to face those challenges in subsequent paragraphs.                                                                       

2. Honeymoon stage: This stage starts just after the retirement when a retiree is much excited about his or her retirement and is more excited to lead a free life when there will not be any binding to go to office. At this stage a retiree is having much expectation from post retirement life as similar to a person joining as a fresher in new job. At this stage one has lot of dreams and expectations from post retirement life. Investment of retirement corpus are made to generate a stable source of passive income and one freely spend time with spouse and friends. Planning for vacations and tours, meeting with relatives and friends, pursuing hobbies, etc., are made at this stage. Many retirees plan for pursuing new hobbies and activities. The excitement is maximum at this stage. 

3. Active Stage:  Honeymoon stage lasts for 2-3 months and thereafter active stage starts. At this stage a retiree is very enthusiastic to implement the decisions taken during honeymoon stage. A person starts doing activities planned during honeymoon stage. A person starts pursuing both old and new hobbies at this stage. Maximum tours and travels are planned during this stage. Active stage lasts for 2-10 years depending on the continuity of a person's enthusiasm and energy level. Period of this stage varies from person to person depending on various factors as described hereunder. 

3.1 Planning too many activities: Many persons planned too many activities during honeymoon stage out of over enthusiasm. Later on, they find it difficult to pursue all those activities planned by them. Activities and hobbies to be selected should be of one's liking and should be implementable on consistent basis. It is better to select few activities and hobbies initially and thereafter to be reviewed periodically to assess its implement ability on consistent basis. Based on one's own review one may either reduce or increase the number of activities to be pursued. 

3.2 Distractions: We are not able to consistently pursue our selected hobbies and activities due to distractions and lack of discipline. Unnecessary thoughts and fears act as distractions. Spending more time in social media is a major distraction. Spending time in social media needed to be optimized. If you are serious about your hobbies, then make a daily schedule for your hobbies and activities and allocate reasonable time for each hobby and activity. Make it a point to keep yourself away from social media and electronic gazette during your scheduled time for activities. This will create self-discipline with increased focus on your hobbies and activities. In addition, have milestones for the achievement of your goal. Milestones will ensure your movement towards the goal. 

3.3 Loss of Enthusiasm: Loss of enthusiasm is another factor reducing active life after retirement. Maintenance and sustenance of enthusiasm can enhance the period of active stage after retirement. Enthusiasm vanishes rapidly if activities were not planned on realistic basis during honeymoon stage. Loss of enthusiasm is due to inability to pursue hobbies or activities and also due to unfulfilled desires. Make it a point to have daily activities moving towards fulfilling your unfulfilled desires. Listening to music while relaxing and reading good motivational books on daily basis will help in keeping you enthusiastic. I would like to recommend the book " Finish What You Start " written by Peter Hollins. 

3.4 Poor Time Management: Poor time management is another reason for inability to pursue the decided activities and hobbies on a consistent basis. Many persons are of the opinion that time management is having its importance in working life only. Time management is having its importance in every stage of our life including post retirement life. Time management is most important during post retirement life because our remaining active life is limited and gradually reducing after each passing day. 

4. Disenchantment Stage:  At this stage, a retired person is less excited about post retirement life. There is a feeling of boredom and loneliness. A person starts feeling useless. This may be due to several health challenges or frustration crept in due to problems in interpersonal relationship with near and dears or it may be due to non-fulfilment of desires which a person decided to fulfil after retirement. There may be several reasons for a retired person to come to this stage. There are persons directly moving from active stage to stability stage without going through disenchantment stage. To come out from this stage a person needs to identify the reasons for entering to this stage. If it is due to health challenge because of old age-related diseases then one need to accept it as natural and continue its treatment. Focus may be shifted to other interesting things like hobbies, listening to music, reading interesting books, cherishing old good memories in life, etc. If it is because of frustration crept in due to problems in interpersonal relationship with near and dear then one need to identify the reasons and accordingly sort it out with. If despite your sincere efforts you are not able to improve relationship then it is better to simply forgive and forget. I have already discussed the issues on interpersonal relationship in my previous post 'Interpersonal Relationship During Post Retirement Life - Challenges and Remedies' the link of which is given below.

https://post-retirementlife.blogspot.com/2022/08/interpersonal-relationship-during-post.html

One important thing should be kept in mind that a person's life is always useful irrespective of age and health condition. Therefore, never feel useless. If you can lead your retirement life with this attitude then you will never pass through this stage of post retirement life.

5. Stability Stage: Retirees are content and satisfied with their retirement life at this stage. This stage generally starts after 10-15 years of retirement day. Retirees are settled into their retirement lifestyle doing the things of their liking. They prefer to make their life simple and relaxing at this stage. Those retirees who successfully pursued their hobbies and carried out their planned activities for achieving their unfulfilled desires are satisfied with their retirement life and they come to this stability stage of retirement and remain in this stage till the end of their life. 

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